weeping in a chapel... just another one of [those] days.

Today I walk into a Catholic church, straight to the prayer chapel, kneel by the altar, light a candle... and I don’t pray. I weep.

For some reason, on this day, I need to go there. Drawn like a magnet to the tiny chapel.

On this day, I realize, once again, how little control I have over my world. And again, the fear and uncertainty rear their heads and glare at me with eyes glowing like red embers.

Balance? What balance??

I recieved this email today:

Hi Joni,
I am one of the authors from EmpoweringLDSWomen.blogspot.com, and we're collecting guest posts from various inspiring mothers discussing how they are able to find balance in motherhood. We're posting these stories in a blog series the week before Mother's Day. Would you be willing to participate and write about how as a mother you are able to balance the many constraints on your time and still find time to do things that are rejuvenating for you? If so, we’d like your post to include the following things:

1. An introduction with some personal information about you and your family (it doesn’t have to be very detailed).
2. At least one picture if possible.
3. A discussion about things that demand your time in a typical daily/weekly schedule, as well as any long-term time constraints you have dealt with (e.g. how you balanced pursuing an education with starting a family, etc).
4. Most importantly, as you deal with all the different demands of Motherhood, how are you able to follow Elder Ballard’s advice to “find some time for yourself to cultivate your gifts and interests,” while not getting caught up in “time-wasting, mind-numbing things like television soap operas or surfing the Internet”?

Thanks also for the inspiring insights you always share on your blog. I'm still fairly new at this, and I look forward to hopefully getting to know you better.

Although I had to politely decline the invitation, due to the fact that I'm not LDS and I haven't the faintest idea who Elder Ballard is, I thought I would like to write the article anyway.