A Mormon Perspective on saying NO to more children

Last Sunday I spent 3 hours finishing off Mormonism in an LDS Church with a sweet friend I met online, Janie. She has her own blog here. She kindly met me here in North Richland Hills so we could go to the ward near my home. As I have been reading her blog, I asked her to share her unique perspective and the LDS perspective on contraception and sterilization. Here are her thoughts:

A Mormon Perspective on Pregnancy, Family Planning, and Sterilization

After During my pregnancy with my fourth child, I was SURE we were done. I told everyone my husband was getting the big snip and I reminded him frequently. I got a card for an urologist from my OB and I carried that card in my wallet. I was considering permanent measures so that I would never EVER have to experience morning sickness again. Add to that: we already had four children (a bigger family than many), my husband had recently been laid off his job, and our house was already bursting at the seams. Four was enough, we were done.

panel experiences

Last week, I headed to UNT for a panel on Women and Spirituality. When I received the notice in my inbox, I nearly peed my pants with excitement... because, what's better than my two favorite topics - women and GOD together in the same discussion!?

Join us for an exploration of gender and spirituality!


The event centerpiece is a panel of women from various faith traditions discussing their personal experiences with the intersection of faith and gender, various traditions' histories of restriction and empowerment, and gender-focused social justice work in religious contexts.


Participants include:

Mormonism - Interview with Emily

I found Emily through a series of clicks. It turns out, that is how I find out about a lot of things! I was online looking for local Mormon women groups and happened upon a Mormon women’s magazine where Emily had written an article (read that article HERE). Lioness at the Gate is her blog aimed at encouraging women to maintain their femininity in motherhood and their roles as women. I read some of the posts on her website and decided to email her to see if she would be interested in being interviewed for my project. She is a mom, a wife, and a writer, and is passionate about her religion. Enjoy the interview!

Joni: Before we really get started, I wanted to explain about my project. Basically I am writing about God and women’s perspectives on God and relationship with God (read the whole explanation of my project here). Do you have any opening thoughts on the project or Mormonism?

Emily: I think my initial thoughts on God are that he is our loving Father. In “Mormonism” ((we typically say The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or LDS)), we refer to him as “Heavenly Father” or our “Father in Heaven.”

Recently as I've studied my role as a mother/woman (you can see the results of that on my blog: http://www.latg.blogspot.com/), I realize that if we call him Father, that must be his most important role -- or the one he wants to be known as -- not king or president of the universe or something. If we look at all the good traits of a father, that is what He is. We should be able to turn to Him as we would a good, kind, loving earthly father.

Mormonism and the LDS Church - Lindsey's Story

I met Lindsey when we went to high school together in Tyler, Tx. Her street dead-ended into mine growing up, so we had the same stomping grounds. I have always admired Lindsey's ability to say exactly what was on her mind without filters - she has changed that a little as she's gotten older (as in, gained more tact!), I think, but it was one of the things I greatly admired about her and one of the things that made me admire her religious beliefs. I am delving into Mormonism starting today, and Lindsey was kind enough to write her story for everyone to read. Her blog Nuclear Family Meltdown never fails to make me laugh, and her authenticity and honesty in how she approaches her life and her writing is inspirational to many! Thanks, Lindsey, for writing about your life! Enjoy!

This is Lindsey’s story.

I am a Mormon woman, but I do not bake fresh bread each morning. My home is not always spotless. I do not always have a smile on my face or a baby in my belly. In fact, my nuclear family of only two children is not typical within my religion, but it works for me. Even though I live in Phoenix ((where the summers, I am convinced, are the exact temperature of Hell)), you will never see me wearing clothes that show 90% of my skin. In fact, you will not even see me wearing a tank top. “Modest is hottest!”

Christianity Wrap-Up V - Katy's Story

This is Katy’s story.

I grew up in a Christian home in Southern California. My dad was a pastor from when I was a baby until about thirteen. I grew up in a family where both my grandfathers were pastors, in fact, pretty much my whole family had lineage of being Protestant Christian except my Grandma. Her parents were Mormon and then converted to Protestant.

My relationship started with God from when I was very young. My parents brought me up in it and when I was five, I accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior. Of course, I didn’t understand it in the context of my own relationship, but I understood it in the context of my parents' relationship with God. For many years, I would rebel, come back to the Lord, rebel, come back to the Lord, because it wasn’t real for me. I think my first real experience with the Lord was when I was seventeen. I was being naughty, sewing wild oats and realized it was not where I wanted to go. I was working through my own relationship with God verses my parents’ relationship with God.

Christianity wap-up IV - Jess's story of worthiness

This is Jess's story.

I was born in a small town in the southeastern corner of Oklahoma.  My mother was 15, and my father just 18 years old.  My mother and father made a great team, they were only married a short time but remained friends and did the best they could to raise me.  My mother worked long hours at Tyson’s hatchery sorting out baby chickens and my father for a local tire shop.  I lived with my mother in a small apartment and had weekend visitations with my father.  Some of my earliest memories are of that apartment.  I spent a lot of time with people from our apartment complex that would babysit me while my mother worked.  Around the age of four and five I was molested.  This was a very confusing time for me.  I believe I started internalizing my feelings around this time.  I did not tell my mother about this until I was 26 years old.  I was afraid of hurting her, or that she would blame herself. .. I do not blame her. 

Christianity Wrap-up, Part III - Tilde's story of resiliance and healing

This is Tilde's story.
I guess for me my whole transformation started back in 1994. I was married in 1991 – I was 23 and my husband was 20. We were in the military, and we were really young, and I had not dealt with a lot of issues that I had growing up as a child. I was molested from the time I was five until the time I was eleven or twelve by multiple people (family members, but not my parents, they had no clue). I really didn’t tell anyone until I was seventeen, and at that time, I just told my mom about one person, not about all of it.

Keeping that to myself was really hard, so it all came out in marriage: being young, and not knowing really how to deal with all that anger and rage and jealousy and insecurity. I could be a really bad wife at times, when that side of me would come out. I hated it.

Christianity Wrap-Up Part II - Dawn's Story [the caretaker]

This is Dawn’s Story.

I’m the oldest of 6 kids and all of those kids are either half siblings or adopted. Obviously, I came from a fractured home, and in my case, it was fractured more than one time.

My mom was an alcoholic and a drug addict. I was born in Houston and when I was about two years old, my mom, who was pregnant at the time with my little sister, left her home under the cover of night, took me and moved with a Marine to California. She had my little sister, then eventually my little brother, and I remember from the time I was about five years old being surrounded by people who were doing drugs, drinking, a lot of sex. I remember seeing my mom on drugs and drunk. I was molested more than one time when I was a kid, just being around all the sexual promiscuity, the drugs, and the alcohol abuse.

Christianity wrap up part I - Story of a Survivor

I had the privilege of interviewing a handful of women who opened up and shared their stories with me on how Christianity has changed their lives. Before I move on to mormonism, I would like to share some of those stories with you. These ladies have given me permission to use their information and have allowed me to give them a voice to speak to the world about their relationship with God, for which I am very grateful. These stories are in their own words.

***

Photo by Mark Cornwell

This is April's story.
When I was younger, I grew up in a Methodist church. I was baptized as a baby, so I wasn’t aware of what was going on or anything like that, my parents raised me in the Methodist church. I had a lot of fun writing notes back and forth to my friends during the service. I wasn’t really engaging at all. I tried to listen to the sermons, but it was just not my thing at all, even when I got older. 

As soon as my folks allowed me to not go to church, I stopped going to church. It wasn’t because I stopped believing in God – there hasn’t been a moment in my life where I didn’t believe in God. I know that that sounds weird to some people, but my parents introduced me to him at such a young age, that out of the gates, I believed in God. Most of that had to do with my mother and how she raised me, how she treated me, and how she had that hopefulness all the time, happiness seemingly all the time.